Free Embroidery Pattern: My Cat is An Asshole

Thursday, October 9, 2014

The mailing deadline for the Kitty Mini Quilt Swap is almost here (Oct. 14th!), but I felt like I needed to make one more treat for my partner. 

Lately, my own cat, Batman, has been extra obnoxious, even for him. His new favorite thing to do is treat my Wacom tablet like his personal seat cushion...while I'm trying to use it. There's also his usual shtick, like "yodeling" as loudly as possible in the hallway at all hours of the night, eating any plant he can get his mouth on (and subsequently puking it up), and bullying our other cat, Chi, for her dinner in addition to his own. 

As my husband I discussed what a jerk Batman is (who we love with all our hearts for some mysterious reason), I found myself pondering every cat I've ever encountered. And guess what? They're all assholes and one point or another! I figured my partner has thought her cat is an asshole at least once. Actually...probably every cat owner has. Thus, this cute embroidery project was born!

I used some Alexander Henry fabric from my stash, strategically placing the cat with the "deal with it" sunglasses at the top. I used a basic back stitch for the entire piece. I finished my piece using this tutorial, substituting the felt for a piece of batting. 

So many of you on Instagram seemed to get a kick out it, so I wanted to share this simple pattern with you guys! 

In case you don't have cute kitty print fabric, I added a sweet (and smug) cat face to the pattern so you can stitch your own. You can down the PDF pattern here. For a 6" embroidery hoop, print at 100% scale. Happy stitching!


  1. I have a friend who named her cat "Cathole" and that cat truly lives up to its name!